''I hear you were born on April 2; a day too late!'

'I hope you never get a tetanus shot; maybe you''ll windup with lockjaw.'

'I you are in your right mind, I hope you go insane!'

'If I told you that I have a piece of dirt in my eye, would you move?'

'Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to like you?'

'If you were a swine, you would be what you are now!'

'You''re very smart. You have brains you never used.'

'A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.'

'You''re nobody''s fool. Let''s see if we can get someone to adopt you.'

'They say no woman ever made a fool out of you. So who did?''